As someone who lives with C-PTSD, Lupus, and Chronic Pain, I know what it feels like to be dealing with crap. But before we dive into this, I want to point out why I am calling it "crap." Crap is something that we all have in our bodies, but it is also something we can let go of and move on from until the next time. And the crap we deal with in life is very much the same.
Anyway, we've established thatmy mental and physical health isn't great, but I always seem to keep on keeping on. There are days when my pain is so bad that I sit on a chair or at the bottom of the shower and think about killing myself just so I am out of pain. Being honest, this happens more than you probably realize, and that's okay because, at the end of the day, I am human with problems. Here is lesson number one for this blog: realizing that you are human and it’s okay to have these thoughts and feelings. Noting this will be a big relief.
So, after my “moment,” I pull myself together by using one of the tools in my mental health toolbox. These tools change depending on the mood and the day. If you want to learn more about my tools, you can find them in my other blogs or podcasts.
It’s funny because at least once a week I get asked, “Why do you do so much?” or I'm told, “If you rest more, you will feel better,” and my response is almost the same every time.
Why should I let this rule my life? And so, this brings us to our next lesson of the blog. Do not let your struggles rule your life. I truly believe that if you give up on the fight, it is going to hit a lot harder than if you stand in the ring ready to fight. Don’t get me wrong, I know it is hard to cope with a few punches, but if you fall down, hitting the ground will hurt more. Self-talk is a key part of staying in the fight and not letting the struggles win. As we mentioned above, it's okay to have a moment, but remember, it is a moment, not a lifestyle.
Something that helps me stay afloat is scheduling in some "me time" and some time to have a moment if needed. This helps me stay focused and reassured that I can accept my feelings in a safe place and time.
But of course, I have had heaps of help getting to this point. In the last 5 years alone, I have had over a 130 hours of psychology sessions, so don't expect to get it right on the first shot or even the tenth shot. Just be kind to yourself, use your tools, and keep on keeping on. You got this.
P.S. I want to let you in on a secret, I am not perfect and still struggle with this process every now and again.
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